What does success really mean to you? Is it about happiness, money, or something else?

I've been trying to use the external world to represent what I have internally and presented to somebody for an exchange of some type of energy, which, let me tell you, it's fucking ridiculous. What a fucking personal go through just to make someone smile, just to make someone feel good. And you know what happens? 
It never really fucking happens. You got that fucking goddamn fake waitress left. oh my God, you're so funny. Or you got like the oh yeah, that fucking be blow you off. 
Or what's even worse? Someone will actually pretend pretend that what you're doing is make them feel good because you know why? It makes them fucking feel good. 
But you know what, let's break this fucking wall down. Let's just fucking go right at it. How many of you are actually having fucking good sexual relationships? 
and I'm not talking about these emotionally connected, super driven, fucking heavily rooted and fucking trauma and love and fucking bonding and possessiveness and all this bullshit that ends up separating everyone. Let me ask you, I had a conversation with a girl the other day and uh you know what? She was pretty fucking hot. 
We were having a good conversation and then she started bringing up oh, um I'm I'm married. And my husband, my husband of 10 years knows exactly how to pleasure me. And I'm like, oh, yeah, really? 
Your husband of ten years knows how to pleasure you. And then she says to me, you know what? I bet you you can even make me come. 
And you know what I fucking said to her? I'm like, woman, I don't think fucking anyone's fucking made you come. I don't even think you know what a fucking orgasm is because honestly honestly there is more than just one type of ground shattering orgasm you can have. 
And if you really look at it and you really know what to do you understand that it's not all about these two fucking sexual reproductive organs getting together. No, you'd be surprised. You'd be surprised about what kind of fucking headway you'd get with some good conversation, some good laughs, some fucking bawling ass motherfucking foreplay that lasts longer than sex does, but not for me, though, because I could fucking like I could straight up just like bite on the lips and bite on the fucking titties and you know, go down on the grill forever. 
I like I like the fucking chase of the chase of pleasure. Like, man, I'm like the fucking prince of pleasure. And like, honestly, I would say king of pleasure, but fucking prince of pleasure just sounds way better. 
Because like in the end of the day, I'm not saying this because I'm some arrogant fucking douchebag that fucking says and thinks that he can fucking displeasure everyone. That's not the case. But I'll tell you something for all you women out there that think, oh, the sex is so good with me, I can give you you know what the sex ain't that good with you. 
You know why? Because you don't know how to use your body. You don't know how to use your soul. 
You don't know how to use your energy, you don't know how to recycle it and you don't know how to give it back. Most of the time, you think these guys are like and having sex with you, but in the end in in their heads, they're fucking breaking themselves down. They're fucking probably precoming, fucking you have to make them apologize, and there's a weird time better you guys are laying together and fucking no one fucking had a good time. 
And then women probably breaks up the vibrator. and that's what the fuck's happening Most women are gonna break out that vibrator. But what I realize is not a boat that sexual pleasure. It's about our emotional blockages. 
Having sex with somebody doesn't have to be this exchange of energy where someone feels that they are fucked over. Because it's like when you shake somebody's hand, you ever shake somebody's hand and it fucking it's like, you go to shake it, and it's just like this wet fucking noodle or like this weird fucking like piece of dryer lint that's been fucking dipped in glue. Like I don't like that shit. 
Same thing with sex. You think guys like masturbating with bitches pussies? Sorry, I have to apologize with my language because I'm not I don't mean any disrespect. 
Like I said before in some of my talks, I was fucking raised in a pretty crude environment. but inside that crude environment, you know what I found? I found the secret of connection without physical touch. because let me tell you something. When you're the only colored kid in a fucking real community and everyone's fucking beating shit out of you because you fucking look different and they're all making fun of you because you look weird and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. 
You know what? My fucking my fucking move was okay. You say I fucking look weird. 
You say I fucking do this nap. I didn't fucking have sex in high school, but you know what I did do you? I fucking flirted. 
I was a big flirt. I fucking loved it. I love flirting. flirting with women is like making fun of dudes. 
It's just total opposite. You know, sometimes you fucking wanna you wanna roast a dude? Well, it's the same thing as fucking flirting with a chick. 
You just gotta hit those right spots, but instead of trying to piss him off, you're trying to fucking make him feel good. But it has to be genuine and you have to fucking really connect with it because in the end of the day, the vagina is a very, very straightforward yet really complex things, kind of like life. You know? 
Sometimes you think you know what you know because of things you watch. And you know what, I've studied a lot of shit. Fucking d engineering if I studied fucking coins. 
I study cards, I study appraisals. I'm an artist. I'm a fucking yoga teacher. 
I'm a fucking carpenter. But you know what? I'm fucking not really any of these things. you know why I do all that shit? 
It's funny, because I haven't had sex in such a fucking long time. Because you know what? honestly? 
all the fucking bullshit attached to it. You guys don't wanna have great relationships? Well, one of the fuck are you gonna wanna be with a dude or a fucking girl for your whole life? 
If the whole time you're sexually frustrated and eventually, eventually, you're going to fucking pull up this cheating cart. Well, you know what? You can fucking have sex with something you don't like. 
Guys do guys fucking fuck their own hands and fucking chicks like fuck silicone rods and shit. There's no attachment there. And most people who are masturbating don't even like themselves. 
Trust me, I've been in those moments where like you're fucking just jerking off, fucking trying to get an orgasm just because you fucking feel shitty. And that's not cool either. Well, I like porn. 
That's a fucking big thing. And you know, I'm not perfect I'm not a frickaking perfect person either. But the more that I can fucking get down and say, you know what? 
These are my fucking flaws and I'm learning to work with them and I bet you I can make you laugh. I bet you through my flaws, I can make you think. I bet you through my flaws you're gonna compare me to a fucking the other dude and you' be like, you know what, those flaws are kind of cool. 
Because you know what? Nothing pisses me off more than somebody that's pretending they're perfect, because when it comes to the bedroom and the fucking you're in that bed and you fucking both book ass naked, looking at each other, you can't fake that shit. Hands down, hands down. 
I can guarantee you out of all the fucking women I've been with I don't think that you know what, a couple maybe when I was really fucked up, but when I'm really like connected and words like even like I don't like fucking drunk sex and high sex. It's not my thing. I like I want that I like it when it's the the rush is the high. because it's unknown. 
It's like if you're a dude, you know it's like you you get into a fight. and fucking sometimes you just get like gang beat by like eight dudes and fucking just sucks. But then you know, when you're the one given the beaten, fuck man, like fucking go for a long time, right? Same thing with the conversation. 
Let's break it down. A conversation stimulates the exact same part of your brain that having good sex does. You get a go premar loose, you get serotonin releases. 
But you know what I'm thinking? I'm having a feeling that there's a lot of people who are fucking robots out there. I see us some people band like the hip, the hip isn't the fucking bone. 
The hip's the joint. If you really wanna fucking fuck your sexual pleasure up, you're gonna be bending, you're gonna be bending from your little back. Okay, you're not gonna be using your hips. 
Your hips are like a rotation point in which you're supposed to save your back, but this is what happens. Energetically, there is this thing called cundolini energy in the yoga world, but oh, I think that is is just you recycling the electr magnetism of the earth, combining that with the energy inside and your you're releasing it to the to the earth, and you are taking up new energy. When you connect with someone, what you're doing is you know, I' pretty sure it doesn't work if you if you if you're gonna use a condom and you don't kiss the girl, I'm pretty sure you can get away with this next little downfla. 
But if you're a raw dog in it and you're making out with these bitches and you don't know who they are, in the Egyptian in Egypt, they believe anyone you kiss is fall falling you into the next life, and they have been a part of your life. Everything a person you kiss. So that's why I think that the sex working ladies, they're actually some of the cleanest ones out there, because they have rules. 
They fucking care about that shit because they don't they don't wanna just be f it's a business to them, just like it is to everyone else, but no one wants to fucking admit it. But I can guarantee you if there's a couple of people out there, even just woman out there, you don't even have to you don't even have to do any kind of penetration to hit the four erag zones that you need to you need to hit in order to make your pelvic floor contract in order to create that pressure, that pressure that's gonna push on those glands and create that contraction. An orgasm is just a contraction of muscles, just like the dude has a prostate and the womenhood of clitoris, the clitoris is actually huge it's big, and it goes like four or five inches in. 
But it's just like a dick. You ever try to fucking jerk off a dick that's soft? Fuck, man, I'm pretty sure most of you women are going into the bedroom with a soft fucking dick, so to speak, right? 
You wouldn't like it if a dude fucking goes in there with the fucking like like you know, that after the cold syndrome and fucking cuts the slam of fucking like like soft ass I don't I don't even like thinking about it because I can feel sorry for women because they have to have sex with dudes. Like, I personally find most men revolting. um so I don't even know what the fuck most women are thinking, because they some women are saying that they like these manly men, but do you do you really or does it just look it on the surface because you know in the end, there is no fucking emotional connection. That guy doesn't make you laugh. 
You're always walking on fucking eggs shehells. and the only thing he knows what I do is tell you what to do but can't give you what you want. Even if you told him what to do, he couldn't do it any, because the moment you start telling this guy how to pleasure you, I can guarantee you he shuts down. No, yeah, you you ever see that? 
You tell you, oh, no, the fucking keep going, keep going. And he stops? Well, cause motherfuckers about to come and all you want him to do is keep going. 
That's like me saying, oh, why are you stopping talking to me? Keep talking to me, keep talking to me. It doesn't work like that. 
So I heavily suggest people stop fucking trying to engineer robots and fight of the fucking moon and fucking dig holes to find goals that they can make electricity go run off into the trees and go bang each other and learn how to do that. We've lost track of this all. There's no love, there's no fucking respect. 
You' people even people are so fucked. You know, I'm fucked. I'm completely fucked up, but I don't judge people and I can walk around this world I can connect with anyone. 
But I wanna ask whoever the fuck is out there that's putting on this fucking front, making billions of dollars of fucking year in their big ass houses in your fancy ass suits. And you know what? I'm not coming from a place where I haven't fucking seen seeing what money can do. 
But you're a pussy if you hide behind it. Right now, I am fucking consciously consciously, just just doing minimal fucking financial things, but I'm giving it back to myself. I'm not trying to impress fucking no one, I'll try to do whatever, like I'm doing my own thing, trying to get my own clothes lamp down, got my art going, got some music shit going, got some fucking video shit go but. back in the day, I was broke as shit growing up, getting beat up fucking every goddamn day when I grew up. getting made fun of by the teachers, hockey coaches hated me basketball coaches bench me, no chick wanted to bang me. 
They fucking dignate my life a living fucking hell. but but they don't know that I also have an opinion and I just didn't want to tell them that, yo, I know what people might think of me, but the fact that I'm not telling you what I think of you should scare the fuck out of you. Because you know what? You just you just gave me power. 
You just pulled me above you. and that's why you can't fuck. That's why you can't have a mur. That's why you never squirted in your life. 
That's why I fucking everyone's watching porn and using vibrors and fucking jerking off after the done having sex. and I'm just sick of it because you know what? I don't care if you could build a fucking rocket ship and go land on fucking Mars and fucking use nuclear energy to fucking save the goddamn sea turtles and fucking do animal husbandry so you can fucking splice a pig with a fucking bee so you have fucking honey making pigf fine bees. I don't give fuck with that. 
We make people, all right? We make people and we forgot that you're spending all your time programming these fucking machines. The only thing that makes us authentic is our pursuit of pleasure. robots don't do fucking things for fun. 
They do things that a necessity, and everyone you got fucking wake the fuck up.c I'm starting to think that every is everyone a robot? I don't fucking know. I don't fucking know anymore. 
All I know is I cry. I freak out. I'm not perfect. 
I'm off. I am a really fucking high functioning individual, but you know what? I looked around the world one day and I just disappointed me. 
Disappointment across the board to the point where I'd rather sit in my house alone getting fucked up on myself rather than have to fucking try to do this dog and pony show with you guys because I can watch a fucking just a wasted fucking douchebag walk up to the horse chick and just completely disrespect her and she's cool with it, but I go and try to have a fucking conversation and just because I might look good and you might have this opinion about me, you're getting give me a chance. because you think it's a power struggle. Fuck man, sex ain't no arm wrestle could be wrestling those sex wrestling's pretty cool. I don't if you ever watch that, but like sex fighting, like that's cool. 
But like I don't care about it. Like you can fucking stratomy all you fucking want, you sit on my face and fucking dr drop me fucking you know fucking squirt out. But the fucking thing is it's like do you know right now like most women? 
You got like 16 flew ounces of of this beautiful juice inside you that like, I sort of garled kick cancer. It' fucking help your skin, help your peach b balance, help your hair, do everything you need to do. And it' help you more flexible. 
But you gotta release it. and most women can't do that alone. We gotta do together. And let me tell you something, guys, the moment you get your girls squirting and you have her fucking coming five, six different times, you know what? 
It doesn't go back, but I suggest you guys go fucking get your pelvic forest strengthened, fucking connect with your root shocker, and you know what, and until then until then, I know you couldn't even fucking make me come and it pisses you off because I'll probably one of the only dudes that you probably couldn't fucking make come because you know what it's not about that for me. It's not about the chase, but and it just a fucking jack off of your vagina. I could do that by myself. 
If you can't fucking meet the elevation of that spiritual emotional fucking freedom of just fucking being able to come whenever you want then let me fucking tell you that must fucking suck and your partner who you guys are fucking bounced around, pretending everything's all good? Have a conversation some fucking Madonna says. Let's talk about sex, right? 
Let's talk about it. Let's fucking talk about it. You guys wanna talk about liberals and you guys wanna talk about fucking politics and fucking moon landings and fucking stock prices and fucking food I don't care. 
I probably don't even have to eat. I could fucking just eat pussy all day long and I'm pretty sure it's probably a better diet than what's going on here. Fuck, I wish I could just do that. 
Like I like having sex stuff I man, everything before sex is is awesome. I'm not I'm not into four play. I'm like into fucking like five or six play. 
I don't know what the fuck that is, but like. Sometimes sitting around I like I got so much fucking energy. And I fucking like will sit I be quiet, but you know what I just wanna fucking hear something. 
Like I don't even hear my hey Andrew, what's going on? Yo, I don't even hear my name anymore. and I'm not even saying many people's names anymore. Because in the end of the day, those names are fuck all. 
You don't want to be fucking trapped in their little game where they have you all fucking jacked up on all these chemicals, fucking breathing in all this fucking toxic fumes, listening to their bullshit to the point where like you are so fucking twisted and tangled up in your own head that you don't even know how to fucking make yourself come. And if you are, it's because you're frustrated. tall man, I fucking miss. There's this one word. 
I fucking if you guys ever have someone you can be sexually explorative with and you guys are both getting off and you guys are fucking both loving it. Like let me tell you something. if you if that's not enough for most people, it's not because we're so fucked up that like when you have something good, you want something better. But then when you try to look for it, you can't find it, you realize I just fucked up because there was nothing better than that. 
There's nothing better than that. And like I love human connection as genuine. None of these fucking fake laughs and fucking exchanges of money or fucking buy me this or buy me that or I'll do this or do that. 
Like I just start straight up, like fucking testing women nowaday. It's like, you don't wanna hang out with me, but then all I say, oh, you wanna fucking do you wanna hang out with me if we I gave you thousand dollars and and make some sex tapes and like, you know, go get your nails done, go get your fucking hair done. Oh, yeah, fuck you. 
Oh, fuck that, man. They never stop. And to all you guys you think that fucking these like hot women are fucking worth it. 
You might have that one hot woman that's giving it up to you, but that hot woman has a million guys that are going to do exactly what you're gonna do. If you basically relationship on this fucking business exchange. Because always someone the has has more than you. 
Let me tell you something. Most of you dudes with a lot of money, you're weird looking. You're weird looking you don't work out, your mind's not calm and you're fucking a snap show. you know, I don't care how smart you are. 
You're if you're not sexually connected to yourself and you can't talk to other people, you don't know like honestly, you're not you're not artistic. You't have no creativity. And you know what? 
Maybe it wouldn't hurt to be a little bit more feminine. Like I I'm fucking feminine as shit, but I am the most greatest dude out there. Like, I am so feminine that I'm pretty sure that I'm a lesbian, but I'm a dude's bike. 
And it's the best of both world, man, because like a lot of people pay a lot of money to have that surgery done. I just fucking naturally landed here. So um I like straight women, I like lesbian women. 
I'm not into dude because dudes are fucking revolting, but you know what? It's a new new day and age room for men. Wake the fuck up, wake the fuck up and make make the women around you feel good. 
With your words, with your actions, with funny jokes, writing poetry, make them food, get them flowers. And fucking learn how to work that area above the pelvic bone. Get that G spot going, fucking go up and down the clint. like there's fourst spots. you got the A sp spot, the oldot, the U spot and the G spot. and don't even get me started with other er Roger zones when you combine them together. 
Well, that's enough ranting. I don't even know why the fuck I just did that here. I just realized I'm like I've been fucking trying to figure out what the fuck I'm good at, I'm trying to prove me myself this now I studying so much. 
I fucking read all these. It'scyclopedias. I read dictionaries, engineering books, fucking carpentry books, I'm doing art, make clothes, doing yoga. you know what? 
I'm about ready to see you know what? Fuck all you all. If you don't wanna listen to me. 
I might be the crazy one, but at least I'm not fucking hiding a bunch of like things that are completely tangling my whole fucking energetic aura up because I'm too fucking embarrassed admit. You want me a minute? Okay. 
I I fucking got bullied while when I was a kid. I have fucking confidence issues. I have selfworth issues. 
I fucking get jealous. I' I'm working on trying not not to self-sabotage because I truly believe I don't believe I don't don't deserve anything good. I've had the best relationships I fucked them over because I'd looked for something else and like the worst thing I ever fucking did. 
But you know what, Karma is a real thing. But um I can guarantee you for fucking every one of my flaws that I have there's ten fucking things that you let. And how is it? 
Yo, oh shit, fuck man, I totally forgot I'm gonna do it right now. Yo, I don't thank you, man. Anyway, I hope you guys have listened and I don't know if anyone's ever gonna hear this shit, but honestly, work those fucking spots, strengthen that pelvic floor, have that strong fucking rooting in your feet and use your knees properly bent from the fucking hips, not the fucking pelvis and it's called uanda, you fucking get that fucking strong stomach going use those muscles to fucking give you these rocket orgasms. being so fucking lame, man. like I wanna be fucking well into my 80s. 
I'm gonna die having sex. instead of fucking dying trying to have sex, like fucking most of you. Peace.